Fifty Shades of Light

If you are a movie or a book buff, you have most likely come across Fifty Shades of Grey already. I was given a copy of the e-book but halfway through it, I stopped reading because 1) all the main characters ever did was have hard-core (the sado-masochistic way) sex, and 2) because of # 1, I could not figure out the plot. All that explicit sex scene made me wonder about the real point of the story.

The movie came out several months ago, and I thought it was a waste of time and money to watch it since the book's genre is erotica - in movies, that is borderline pornography.

But thanks to a free movie watching site (rainiertamayo.com), I managed to watch the movie today. An FB friend said he thought the movie was depicted with more artistry than the book. True, indeed. The cameramen were all good at taking chiaroscuro shots by dimming the lights and casting a shadow on the ehem parts of the actor and the actress. The actor, played by Jamie Dornan and actress, portrayed by Dakota Johnson, however need to polish their acting chops. Dornan's portrayal of Christian Grey, a troubled multimillionaire was not convincing enough. I think he should have spent some time with men who have sexuality problems, so he could get into his role. Johnson, on the other hand lacked something I could not quite put my finger on. She played the role of Anastasia Steele, an English lit major who fell in love with Grey, and who eventually became his submissive sex slave. I am not sure if it is Johnson's personality or if it was just the way she played the role, but it gave me the impression that all English majors are helpless and stupid because they are romantics, and thus they will easily be preyed upon by sex maniacs. I almost choked on my okra because she interviewed Grey without reviewing the questions first. I mean, hello? It is an SOP to go over the questions before you interview someone. Any sensible English major should know that.

I believe there is sequel of this movie because there are three books of Fifty Shades of Grey. The plot is simple and predictable. It is similar to a modern fairy tale. Grey is the prince who has his own issues while Steele is a princess who despite her naivete, has a good heart. Grey became a sadist because he was abused as a child, and Steele allows him to do whatever he wants because she loves him so much. The ending of the movie shows Steele saying goodbye to Grey because she couldn't take him anymore, but the sequel tells me that they will be back in each other's arms and even get married.

I guess I have to give credit to E.L. James' theme here - the only redeeming point of the story which is love conquers everything. Love can take you out of the dark. Love can destroy the walls that a cold person surrounds himself with. Love can change a person into someone more lovable and loving. But of course, this is not possible if the person is not opening his heart to that someone who is willing to love him. And this is something Mr. Grey has to learn just yet.

Mommy Plans

My baby boy is now on his 30th week in my tummy. 10 more weeks and I will get to hold him in my arms. I now have a few things in my mind before he makes his debut.

1) LEAVE

I intend to still teach this coming June to July. Then, August to September I will take my maternity leave. My due date is on August 3, 2015. He will turn exactly 40 weeks on that day. But we can never tell if he will arrive exactly on the due date. It is possible that I will go into labor 2 weeks before or after my expected date.

From October to March I'll take a leave without pay from the school as I intend to be a full-time mom for 6 months. That also means 6 months without salary! But it is OK - anything for the little guy.

2) BREASTFEED

I also plan to exclusively breastfeed for 6 months - that means Thirdy and I will be together around the clock. I have done my research about exclusive breastfeeding and I will also be joining a support group of breastfeeding moms (check the Breastfeeding Ilonggas group in FB). I am committed to this plan, and I do hope I will not falter or get discouraged along the way.

3) SAYA CARRY

I have first seen this saya carrier from a young mother in school. Instead of the usual expensive backpack style carrier, she was wearing a colorful cloth where her baby was sitting comfortably (she was straddling her mother's side). It is no different from what the atis are using, and I told myself that once I have a baby, I will use that one too. Again, I did my research and I found SaYa baby carrier. I have read glowing recommendations from other moms, so I asked hubby to buy me one, too (they only sell online).

There are several ways that you can wear it and it comes in different sizes, too. An acquaintance told me she used it for the first 2 months only because her son got bigger that she felt the cloth was suffocating him. So she switched to another brand. The one I will buy though is from their new line. It is made up of nylon and spandex, so it is a little expensive. 

So there goes the baby debut plan. I am glad I have met moms along the way who have been into this. I do hope everything goes smoothly especially the breastfeeding plan. I have heard that sometimes no matter how well-planned and ideal your desires are for your child, you will encounter events where your decisions will be compromised. The same is true for the birth plan. But let me talk about the birth plan later. That one deserves a lot of research, too. 

Conversations with Strangers

I have never considered myself a good conversationalist. I usually keep my thoughts to myself when I'm surrounded by people I have just met, and to be honest, when I think the person I'm dealing with isn't worth my time, I'll keep my mouth shut for the entire time that we're together. So, these two out of the blue conversations I had with strangers I met today and yesterday are something worth mentioning here because I don't usually warm up to people that fast.

Yesterday, I was at the bank for a transaction and while waiting for my turn (I waited for almost 20 minutes), the girl behind the desk where I was seated struck up a conversation with me. She first started by asking how many months I was in my pregnancy and if I could answer a survey. She's the sales manager of the bank's insurance and investment, so after I was done answering she introduced some of their products. We talked about the nature of what she was trying to sell me, about the best banks in the country, about the best hospitals in Iloilo, and many other things. I learned that she used to be a medical representative and that she's just 2 months on her job as the sales rep of the bank. I emphatically listened to her as she poured out that she's still adjusting because the transition from a travelling job to a desk job wasn't that easy. I was just sitting there, but somehow I felt that I made her feel better by allowing her to express her feelings. When my transaction was done and when I was about to leave the bank, she waved at me. I waved back, and I felt a certain kinship with her. I didn't get her name. Hmmm... perhaps I could give a her a fan (she commented that my fan was cute).

Today, I went to the restroom in Quezon Hall, and I passed by a pregnant woman. She looked serious, but upon seeing my tummy she smiled at me, so I smiled back. After relieving myself, I went out to get some fresh air, and I was surprised that the pregnant woman struck up a conversation with me. She started by asking (also) how many months I was, and the rest of our conversation pretty much stayed on the topic of our respective pregnancies. Again, a complete stranger poured out to me her feelings. She said she was elated when she learned that she was pregnant because she waited for 7 years for it. She took numerous vitamins and endless visits to the doctor because both she and her husband had fertility problems. It became frustrating for her that she decided to take the medications for a year. After the medication hiatus, she went back to her doctor because of a breast lump. She was scheduled to have a mammogram, but the technician said she had to be sure she's not pregnant before she goes under the exam. So she went home and took a pregnancy test the next day. She had taken pregnancy tests about a hundred times for the last 7 years, each time giving her a single negative line, so how could this one be any different? But the pregnancy test turned out positive and now she's 8 months on the way with a baby boy. I am happy for her, and when we were about to go back to our respective rooms, I bid her a good and healthy pregnancy. Again, there was that kinship feeling with a complete stranger. But I got her name this time. Thank you, Ella for that warm conversation.

I make a good conversation topic

One's pregnancy could really be a good conversation starter. Sometimes, conversations with strangers are better because probably there aren't any prejudice and feelings of uneasiness or insecurity that will make one shy or afraid of opening up. I guess our parents are wrong when they warned, "Don't talk to strangers"?

Because I'm a good listener

Thirdy on 3D

Our little Thirdy is on his 27th week now. We had an ultrasound last May 1st and we're delighted to know that he's a boy! Here's a snapshot of him from a video hubby took.

He really looks like his Dad from this angle. Oh, I can't wait to hold him. Ultrasound really is an amazing tool. It gives parents a glimpse of their child while in the womb and that's something our parents weren't able to experience. I'm leaving you with a heartwarming video from Huggies about a blind woman who was given a chance to "see" her baby.